Mehhhh.

What is wrong with my life at the moment?
EVERYTHING!

I have one 'friend' who i dont particularly want to be friends with anymore, that sounds really nasty but she is horrible! (Im just going to have a proper full on rant now) she thinks she owns me, im not even joking, she can pretty much get me to do anything she want me too and she is just constantly putting me down, she will give you this look like your completely worthless, today i almost lost it with her. I dont get like that easily but it has been building for ages now and i just kinda snapped. She didnt talk to me for a while after but then about an hour later she was acting like nothing had happened, just shows how she doesnt take anything I say seriously! :@

Then now I really dont know what im doing, im scared i am about to lose the most important person in my life due to my old best friend! I know this person really doesnt like me talking to my old best friend even though he is all like 'oh yeah i dont mind' he only says he doesnt mind when i say i wanted to talk to him. I am never happy anymore and no one can make me happy :/ its very rare that im happy and to be honest im usually happiest when i have my phone no where near me, im tempted to throw it away, its just too much heartache.
The guy i love is scared im going to leave him for my old best friend, which i am not! My old best friend is all like 'oh yeah we would be great together' 'i love you' Im just getting even more confused by the whole thing, i dont love my old best friend and i never will. I think he is like this because of how close we used to be when we were little kids, we were inseperable and if i hadnt moved away i can imagine that we would actaully be together but i dont want him now! I have found someone way better, way more special, a decent guy who i am not going to give up without a fight!
I started talking to my old best friend again right after his fiance cheated on him and left him and i was apparently the only one who was nice to him, i kinda wissh i wasnt as nice because i now feel trapped and like i cant get away from him. i dont want to be horrible and just tell him to go away like everyone is telling me too but im scared he is going to ruin my relationship. I know i cant let this happen and i wont. i will not let him but i cant jusst abandon him, no one knows how much i have wanted him back since i moved away and now is my chance for my friend back, i cant just throw it away, it feels like i either get my boyfriend or my friend and i know my boyfriend will ALWAYS come first but i cant be horrible to my friend :(

Why is life never easy??! I can imagine it only gets harder! x